“Whenever anything disagreeable or displeasing happens to you, remember Christ crucified.” - St. John of the Cross.

It's not his birthday, not Halloween (his favorite holiday), not even the anniversary of his death. Father’s day has become the toughest day of the year since Griffin's passing for me. I suppose it’s because, on September 2, 2017, a big part of my identity, while on this pilgrimage, was torn away. I was having a conversation with a holy priest the other day, and he spoke these words. I told him I felt like it was my responsibility to do everything I could to see my son again one day. He reminded me that we do not EARN our way into heaven as children of God — all that’s required is that we get up one more time than when we fall. He also shared that our identity should rest not in what we do for a living, in being a husband or even a father, but in one thing and one thing alone…being a child of an all-loving and merciful God. Comforting words to someone who falls frequently and looks to the world to define who I am.  

That got me thinking about St. Joseph, our foster father, and the example he set for all dads. There are two words that I believe describe St. Joseph better than all others — obedient and humble. The Lord spoke, and St. Joseph did not say “but, Lord.” He responded with obedience to the Father’s will and a degree of humility that, when reflected upon, is difficult for me even to comprehend. And it would be foolish of us to believe that his obedience and humility stopped with God; his actions prove that it was in his character to LIVE those virtues.  

So now to my point. Obedience to our lord on the level of St. Joseph requires one thing above all others — unwavering trust in God’s Providence and His plan for our lives. My prayer for all fathers on the day we celebrate such a holy vocation is that we are not let our identities be shaped by who the world says we are. Nor what the world says makes us successful, but by humbly being obedient to the plans of our Father (who we should all be trying to imitate). We are formed into the men and dads we were created to be through trust in a design that can be difficult to accept when life gives us trials and when we go through low spots. The same loving God who was everything when Griffin was born was still everything the day he died. 

May your identities as sons of God pour into every vocation the Lord calls you to live. I’ll be praying for you all Sunday…Happy Father’s Day!