We've all been there: the funeral, the graveside service, or maybe just after a loved one has passed away. And we know how hard it is to be surrounded by people who are trying to make you feel better but who don't really know what to say or do.

As the first anniversary of my son's death approached, I felt anxious. I felt like I was struggling to find comfort. The first year without Cayse was especially hard. Part of why it was so hard was because everyone wanted to pretend like nothing happened. They didn’t want to bring up the loss of Cayse because they didn’t want to make me sad or uncomfortable. But what they didn't realize is that by not talking about Cayse, they're making me more sad and uncomfortable in the long run!

But what can you do? What forms of support will help? How can you help your friend or family member through this difficult time?

There are many ways to offer support to someone who has lost a loved one. You can talk about how they're doing (or not doing) with their grief; you can listen when they need an ear; you can offer your time and attention; you can give them space when they need it most; you can bring them to the gravesite for a visit with there loved one or even bring flower arrangement on the anniversary to the gravesite. That would make a momma's heart smile when they go for a visit.

You don't have to be an expert in grief to help someone who has lost their loved one—just be there for them. Your presence alone can offer comfort.