Kissing the Cross
Growing up Catholic in South Louisiana, I never really entered into Good Friday and the venerating (kissing) of the Cross. Yes I went to each Mass, but did I actually realize what I was doing? Even in my young adulthood, I can say I had absolutely no clue. I simply went through the motions.
That is, until Good Friday 2018. It had been 4 months since we buried our son Leo, who passed away from SIDS. I was still burning with anger as we entered Holy Week. Just like at each Sunday Mass, I didn’t want to be there. I just wanted to sit in my sorrow and be mad. Be mad at a God who “took my son” from me. It wasn’t until that Good Friday in 2018. I realized God hadn’t “done” this to me. What He had done, was gift me my precious son. He allowed Leo to enter our lives and bring us pure joy for 6 months and two days. What He had done, was not allowed me to drown in sorrow. He had surrounded our family with so much love and care from our clergy and our church community!
As I sat in my pew that Good Friday, I realized I would be kissing the Cross that I had been asked to carry the past 4 months. A Cross that I would’ve never chosen for my family. A Cross that I felt was too heavy for me. But kiss it, I did. Standing in line I felt like I was shaking, that the walls of our Cathedral were closing in on me. With hot tears streaming down my face, I got closer and kissed it. I knew that my Faith was the sole reason that I didn’t collapse in that moment.
We have now experienced 5 Good Fridays since that day. I can say without any hesitation that my love for the Eucharist has strengthened me in the journey, of carrying my cross. The faith that was instilled in me, by my parents growing up, formed me for this tremendous cross of child loss.
Please be assured of our prayers during this Holy Week of our Lord. Take courage and I hope that this pray from St. Francis de Sales, can bring comfort.
“Your Cross”
The everlasting God has in His wisdom foreseen from eternity the cross that He now presents to you as a gift from His inmost heart. This cross He now sends you He has considered with His all-knowing eyes, understood with His divine mind, tested with His wise justice, warmed with loving arms and weighed with His own hands to see that it be not one inch too large and not one ounce too heavy for you.
He has blessed it with His holy Name, anointed it with His consolation, taken one last glance at you and your courage, and then sent it to you from heaven, a special greeting from God to you, an alms of the all-merciful love of God.