How to keep Memories going after your child dies.

A few ways to keep your child’s memory alive.


In the aftermath of loss, it is so important for families to remember their children. Although their lives were brief, we honor them and give their life the dignity it deserves. We hold onto every moment we have with them.  A few ways to honor their memory are listed below.

Designate a Place To Display Photos

You can begin by organizing a place in your home where you will display all of your child's photos. If you want to keep these photos in an area where you can see them daily, place them in a frame on the wall or on the mantlepiece. You can even make a little table where all their belongings can remain. Add a prayer candle, a crucifix, a rosary, or any other items you may love.

Create Memory Boxes

If possible, you should include some of your child's favorite things in this box, such as stuffed animals and toys, birthday or holiday mementos, school projects, artwork, and journals or diaries that they wrote while living.

Those things don't exist for me because my son was born still. Instead, I have a few items that I treasure and have organized into a few shadow boxes in my home. We have a  shadow box in every room of my house. We keep the things we do have inside the shadow boxes to remember him. In one of the shadow boxes is the outfit he wore when he was baptized in the hospital; his baptismal and burial outfit was made from my wedding dress, which is so special to me. The box also contains a card with his room number, weight, and doctor's information. We display this box in our living room for everyone to see. Sometimes we get questions about the shadow box from people who have never met our son. This is a great opportunity for me to talk about our son. 

Recall the Little Moments

Recalling moments when our child was with us can sometimes bring up complicated feelings. You might feel sad as you remember the moments and memories you shared with your child. You are allowed to cry if you need to. It's a time for grieving and sadness and remembering all the good and bad memories.

It is important to remember those little moments because they can help us cope with grief. Despite not wanting to remember the day when our child died or when we learned that their life was ending soon, it is important to remember these things because they will help us through the grieving process in the long run. 

Use Memorial Jewelry to Remember

  • You can order a pendant, bracelet, or ring to memorialize your child. Several of these items have charms with their names on them that can be added.

  • It is also possible to get charms engraved with their picture.

  • Necklaces with their saint name or your favorite saint also is a great way to honor them. 

  • Use the flowers from their funeral arrangement for rosaries, rings, charms, etc.

 I have a ring made of flowers from his funeral. I wear my ring every day. When I attend a funeral, the family asks, what will I do with all these flowers? I always show them my ring. 


Share Memories with Others

As much as you want to keep your child's memory close to your heart, sharing these memories with others is also important. Sharing your child's story will make the loss of your child more tangible for those who knew him or her. Telling stories about their life can also provide comfort for everyone involved and help you process what happened. You might be able to help someone experiencing a similar loss by sharing memories of the person who died and how you coped with grief.

After losing someone so dear to us all, you can begin the healing process by talking about your loved ones in terms that others can relate to. Take time and give yourself space to heal as well.

Keeping memories is a great way to be happy during hard times

By holding onto your memories; you can cope with your loss and feel happier. You can remember how much your child meant to you when you remember the good memories.

In the wake of a loved one's death, it's hard to think about anything else. Remembering your child can be therapeutic and healing when you follow these tips. Remembering their favorite activities or things will help keep them alive in your mind while also providing you comfort as time goes on.

If there are moments when you feel overwhelmed, try to remember the good memories. Even if you have to write them on notecards to remember and read them daily, focusing on the good memories can settle your heart on days when you don’t know how you will make it through to the next day.


Ashley Leger

Ashley Leger currently lives in Parks, a small town in Louisiana. She is married to her husband Brayton and together they have two sons. Coen is 5 years old and their little saint in heaven Cayse. Cayse was diagnosed with Anencephaly at 11 weeks gestation, and we carried him as far as the Lord allowed. He was born into heaven on January 6, 2021.

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