Where is my Baby Now?

Understanding the Catholic Church’s Teaching on the Death of Unborn or Unbaptized Babies

Every parent whose child has died desires to be reunited with them. Through the sacrament of baptism, our babies are reborn as children of God and given the gift of eternal life. But what about our children who die before or shortly after birth and are never baptized?

If your baby died before being baptized, your heart may be crying out, “Where is my baby now?”

There is hope for your hurting heart.

When a child is stillborn or dies before being baptized, parents will often persist in asking for baptism anyway – but it is really an agonizing desire to know the answer to the question: “Is my unbaptized child with God?” Grieving mothers and fathers long to know if they will ever see those children again. 

  • Limbo is not official Catholic doctrine or dogma.

  • Limbo refers to a state of being after death which is not heaven, hell, or purgatory and is where unbaptized infants were thought to go.

  • The Revised Baltimore Catechism stated: "Infants who die without baptism of any kind do not suffer the punishment of those who die in mortal sin. They may enjoy a certain natural happiness, but they will not enjoy the supernatural happiness of heaven." 

  • Our present Catechism makes no mention of limbo at all. 

You may have heard about limbo. Limbo is the name given to a theoretical place unbaptized infants were thought to go where they suffered no pain or remorse since they had committed no sin, but did not receive the beatific vision of God because they were not in a state of grace due to the stain of original sin. Limbo was generally considered a place of total happiness where unbaptized souls had no awareness of what they were missing in the fullness of the presence of God. Understandably, this idea is heart-breaking for faithful parents who desire their children to be in the presence of God and also desire to be reunited with their children one day. 

Limbo: Clearing up the Confusion

Although the Church does not have a definitive teaching on the fate of our beloved, unbaptized babies, the Church does offer hope for parents who long to be reassured that their babies are with the Lord.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church (1994) says cautiously that Catholics are “allowed to hope” that there is a way of salvation for infants who die unbaptized (#1261). However, the Catechism also emphasizes that “the Church does not know of any means other than baptism that assures entry into eternal beatitude” (# 1257).

The full paragraph says: “As regards children who have died without baptism, the Church can only entrust them to the mercy of God, as she does in her funeral rites for them. Indeed, the great mercy of God who desires that all men should be saved and Jesus’ tenderness toward children which caused him to say: ‘Let them come to me, do not hinder them’ allow us to hope that there is a way of salvation for children who have died without baptism” (CCC 1261).

Though baptism by water  is the ordinary means by which God transmits sanctifying grace, the Church teaches that there are other ways. The realities of baptism of blood and baptism of desire are affirmed by the Catechism (CCC 1258). In addition, CCC 1257 states that although God has bound salvation to the sacrament of baptism, “he himself is not bound by his sacraments.” 

So, if the Church doesn’t teach limbo, what does she teach? Hope in God’s mercy.

“Your faith spoke for this child. Baptism for this child was only delayed by time. Your faith suffices. The waters of your womb – were they not the waters of life for this child? Look at your tears. Are they not like the waters of baptism? Do not fear this. God’s ability to love is greater than our fears. Surrender everything to God.” - St. Bernard of Clairveaux

“The Hope of Salvation for Infants who Die Without Being Baptized”

In 2007, the International Theological Commission (ITC),  consisting of thirty theologians acting as an advisory panel to the Vatican, in particular to the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, issued a report on the hope of infants who die without being baptized. To Catholic parents who have lost a child to miscarriage, stillbirth, an adverse prenatal diagnosis or some other tragedy prior to baptism, such hope is a healing balm for a wounded heart.

  • “The Hope of Salvation” reiterates and builds upon the Catholic tradition and offers reasons to hope that God may provide a way of salvation to those little ones whose lives ended before baptism was possible.

  • ITC reports are not authoritative Church teaching and not binding but provide guidance and information in an area of ambiguity. 

  • While this document calls the limbo of children into question, it by no means closes the door on the traditional teaching of limbo.

  • None of these positions has been officially proclaimed by the Magisterium. Catholics are free to have varying opinions on this matter. 

Highlights from the “Hope of Salvation”

  • “It is possible that God simply acts to give the gift of salvation to unbaptized infants by analogy with the gift of salvation given sacramentally to baptized infants” (HS 87). “God’s power is not restricted to the sacraments” (HS 82).

  • There is the possibility of baptism of desire (in votum), with the votum offered either by the infant’s parents or the Church. “The Church has never ruled out such a solution,” we are reminded (HS 94).

  • “[W]e dare to hope that these infants will be saved by some extra-sacramental gift of Christ . . . We are very clear that the ordinary means of salvation is baptism, and that infants should be baptized; Catholic parents have a serious obligation.”

  • It is reasonable to “hope that God will save infants when we have not been able to do for them what we would have wished to do, namely, to baptize them into the faith and life of the Church” (HS 103).

  • Read the full text of Hope of Salvation here. 

St. Gregory of Nyssa (fourth century)

The fate of these souls [unbaptized babies] is “something much greater than the human mind can grasp” and he found solace in the fact that “the One who has done everything well, with wisdom, is able to bring good out of evil” (HS 12).

Cardinal Cajetan (16th  century)

“Children still within the womb of their mother are able to be saved . . . through the sacrament of baptism that is received, not in reality, but in the desire of the parents.” (commentary on the Summa Theologica (III:68:11)

“One should not hesitate to give up the idea of ‘limbo’ if need be …  and it is worth noting that the very theologians who proposed ‘limbo’ also said that parents could spare the child limbo by desiring its baptism and through prayer”. (The Ratzinger Report 147-8, 1985)

— Cardinal Ratzinger (future Pope Benedict XVI)

“Most Merciful Jesus, You yourself have said, ‘Learn from Me for I am meek and humble of heart.’ Receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart all meek and humble souls and the souls of little children. These souls send all heaven into ecstasy and they are the heavenly Father's favorites. They are a sweet-smelling bouquet before the throne of God; God Himself takes delight in their fragrance. These souls have a permanent abode in Your Most Compassionate Heart, O Jesus, and they unceasingly sing out a hymn of love and mercy.”

— Jesus to St. Faustina in the Diary of Saint Faustina: Divine Mercy in my Soul

The rite entrusts “to the abundant mercy of God, that our beloved child may find a home in his kingdom” and  “God of all consolation, searcher of mind and heart, the faith of these parents . . . is known to you. Comfort them with the knowledge that the child for whom they grieve is entrusted now to your loving care.”

— Ordo Exsequiarum (Order of Christian Funerals) 

Have Hope, Dear Mothers and Fathers 

Though not explicitly stated in Church teaching, both the Catechism, the liturgy, and the saints give us hope and reason to believe that our children are with God in Heaven. Be at peace. The love and mercy of God are great. Your child was known, created, and loved by God no matter how long he or she lived.   

“What we do know for certain is this: God has a plan. God is perfectly just and perfectly merciful. God is love. We can rest assured that whatever plan God has established for infants who die without baptism, it is more just, more merciful, and more loving than whatever we may imagine, not less.” 

(Matthew Newsome, Catholic Answers)

Listen up.

Unbaptized Babies with Fr. John Paul Mary

Unbaptized Babies with Fr. John Paul Mary on our Behold and Be Held webinar, a question was asked by a mother of loss.